THE WILD WORLD OF BATWOMAN
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Not Rated
| Copyright 1966 ADP Productions & Medallion TV Enterprises
| Reviewed by TCBK1015
on 20 April 2002
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- Batwoman - Crime fighter that dresses as if she were working a brothel. ID never revealed.
- Rat Fink - Evil villain that looks like a luchador. Has a fetish about listening to other people's conversations. Captured by Batwoman.
- Professor Neon - Mad scientist and employee of Rat Fink. Created a happy pill that makes people do dances like the monkey.
- Hethcliff - Neon's dimwitted assistant. Made smart after being caught in an explosion, then made dumb again after being hit in the head with a newspaper.
- Tiger - One of the henchmen that kidnapped one of the batgirls. Falls in love with that same batgirl.
- Bruno - The second henchman that kidnapped one of the batgirls. Gets bitten by the same batgirl on the way to the hideout.
- J.B - Head of Ayjax, developer of the Atomic Hearing Aid. Has a fetish about listening to other people's conversations, hint, hint.
- The Batgirls - Girls who work with Batwoman to fight evil and wear the tightest pants known to man.
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If you want to see hot chicks in action...rent a porno. Sure, this has hot chicks, but even if they were sleeping with each other, the movie wouldn't be worth it.
This movie has 3 openings; two of witch have nothing to do with the plot. First, we find out how girls join Batwoman and her synthetic Vampires by drinking...YOGURT! It gets worse.
The second is a mugging gone wrong and the Batgirls who witnessed him can do only what Batgirls can do...CALL BATWOMAN! That's it. Nothing else. It gets worse.
The third opening, and the one that HAS something to do with the movie are all the Batgirls at a dance club. One of them is given a drugged drink by Tiger and Bruno while the other Batgirls just dance and dance for two more minutes. And yes, it gets worse.
Meanwhile, outside of Batwoman's house, we see...An UNEMPLOYED LUCHADOR! Seriously, we see Rat Fink peeping in to Batwoman's living room seeing her getting a call about the kidnapped girl.
The girl is taken to Professor Neon and his sidekick with the "Hilarity of Drop Dead Fred" as Mike said in the MST3K ep: Hethcliff. We then find out that they work for Rat Fink who needs Batwoman for his DIABOLICAL SCHEME! Note that I'm being sarcastic about that one.
After a whole day (Or what felt like a lifetime), the girls and Batwoman form a plan to get their member back, when Rat Fink uses the kidnapped girl's radio to call Batwoman, who knows who he was from his first words. He wants Batwoman to go to the lair and meet him and his goons. Once there, we see that Prof. Neon invented a Happy Pill that causes people to dance. Think Prozac times 10 with Acid mixed in. The goons and Batwoman gather around a screen with chocolate milk and see Rat Fink's calling. While hearing that Rat Fink will let the girl go if Batwoman helps him steal an ATOMIC HEARING AID (Yes, nuclear powered hearing aid), Neon spikes Batwoman's drink with a pill. She sees this and gives the spiked drink to Neon, who winds up dancing the monkey as she opens the cage they were keeping the Batgirl in and left the area.
We then find out that the hearing aid has the power to cause a big explosion if nitro is applied to it and that's why Rat Fink wants it. Batwoman and the girls are hired to protect it, but wind up eating soup spiked with the Happy pill and while they're dancing, they steal the hearing aid.
Will they get it back? Will Batwoman stop Rat Fink? Will this movie drive you insane to the point where you can't wait until "Passions" is on? I can answer that last one: Yes.
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Things I Learned From This Movie: | |
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- Apparently, a foot is not the only thing that turns people on. Phone conversations do too.
- When seeing someone being mugged, talk to the woman who's on the other end of your wrist radio. Police do nothing, it's talking that gets...well, nothing got done here...never mind.
- A friend being kidnapped shouldn't stop your dance party.
- People get tired of being happy.
- Weird looking radar guns work better than lock picks.
- Crooks, be sure your goons don't fall in love with the woman they're kidnapping or your crime will be foiled.
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- 1 min - OOOOOOOOOOOO! An initiation process. I'm sure this'll...wait...YOGURT?! SYNTHETIC VAMPIRES?! This is gonna hurt.
- 4 mins - Want to know if you shot the guy you were mugging? Look into the barrel of your loaded gun.
- 5 mins - And now, we're at a dance club. Dance club? What about the mugging?
- 8 mins - A peeping luchador.
- 15 mins - What's he doing to that model? EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
- 36 mins - Want to find a stolen object and all you have to help you is Batwoman? Hold a seance. Hahahaha...kill me.
- 37 mins - BAD CHINESE ALERT!
- 38 mins - Again with the bad Chinese?!
- 38 mins - ENOUGH WITH THE BAD CHINESE ALREADY!
- 39 mins - FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY, SHUT UP!
- 50 mins - What? Hey! That's from "The Mole People!" That's just...hahahahahaha! Someone, please kill me. I DON'T WANNA SEE THIS MOVIE!
- 65 mins - If I may quote Tom Servo at this point: END! END!
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- Captured Batgirl: "I'm tired of being happy!"
- Hethcliff: "When I was a little boy, I was hit on the head and that was responsible for my high IQ."
- From the MST3K Ep, Tom: "END! END!"
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| Audio clips in wav format | SOUNDS | Starving actors speak out | |
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| File | Dialog | | wbatwoman1.wav
| Batgirl: "Batgirl Fourteen to Batwoman, Fourteen to Batwoman. Witnessed a holdup that turned into murder."
| | wbatwoman2.wav
| Batwomen: "Batwoman speaking, who is this?"
| | wbatwoman3.wav
| A spirit speaking Chinese to Batwoman.
| | wbatwoman4.wav
| Tiger: "Come on, we're just about near the big cavern. It's really something. You ain't never seen nothing like it! And wait 'til you see the monsters outside of Rat Fink's lab."
| | wbatwoman5.wav
| Professor Neon: "But you never let me see them anymore! You're always putting me off! They're my monsters, Rat Fink. I created them..."
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| Click for a larger image | IMAGES | Scenes from the movie | |
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| Watch a scene | VIDEO | MPEG video files | |
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| wbatwoman1.mpg
- 2.8m
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Rat Fink used a gadget to duplicate himself. Wackiness ensues.
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| Leave a comment | EXTRAS | Buy the movie | |
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